As of tonight, December 26 2009, I am taking a leave of absence from the blogosphere for an undetermined length of time. God has put it on my heart to simplify my life in terms of the amount of both media input and media output. The internet is a dangerous place to say things, partially because you don't know who's reading, but more importantly (I think) because it's a faceless medium with no consequences. By this, I mean to say that one feels liberated to say things online which one would never dream of saying in person, and is therefore unhealthy and unbalanced.
I keep this blog largely because I like having my little soapbox on the internet. While I am grateful for those of you who do read what I write, I must always be mindful of my intentions with this tool. Right now, it exists for selfish reasons. It has become an outlet for feelings and frustrations that belong in prayer alone. (You may not feel that way, but you must believe this is the reality of my internal struggle.) Also, I think blogs are best put to use when they are a medium for sharing passions, and my passion has become... parenting. Yet I find myself in the strange predicament of not actually being qualified to talk about my passion. With all these ideas, struggles, and emotions whirling around in my soul, I know that I must turn from my computer to simple pen and paper, and from the faceless internet to me-and-Jesus time.
Simply put? I'm at a huge emotional transition in my life, and the last thing I should be doing is talking about things online which I have very little business talking about. There's so much GOOD content out there, and I don't feel like I'm contributing to that. So with that, I take my leave. I'm not sure when I'll be back, but I hope God will lead me back soon. In the meantime, here are some of the blogs I idolize and love:
Soule Mama
Conversion Diary
Betty Duffy
Sorta Crunchy
Holy Experience
Ta-ta and God Bless,
Katie
Saturday, December 26, 2009
Sunday, December 13, 2009
A Childish Confession
I do have a confession for the world. And here it is: I have tantrums.
Two clarifications: 1) Yes, I am a fully functional adult and 2) Not the kicking and screaming kind of tantrum. I was just reading a bit of What to Expect the Toddler Years (the third in a series of go-to parenting books, for those not in the know), particularly a little sidebar about how tantrums are not just for kids. And it hit me that, in fact, I am one of those adults who sometimes cannot handle her emotions. Usually frustration. A lot of people have outburst when they are angry, yes. I just mean to say that I KNOW I'm one of them.
Examples, you ask? But of course. Just last week I accidentally left my purse at a bridal shower located an hour away, and didn't realize it until I had gotten home. Upon facing the prospect of driving another two hours that night, I started crying in frustration and desperation. Friends try to work through my problems like this with me, bless their hearts, but there are many times when I just have to have it out. I recall another time a couple years ago when it was my responsibility to get balloons for a roommate's birthday. Walgreens didn't have any. I looked and looked on campus and there were simply no balloons to be had. Not a big deal, right? Wrong. To me, it was a big deal. I cried about that too, venting my frustrations to another roommate.
I've cried over bad grades in college classes. I've thrown my phone against a wall because my reception was poor. Don't even ask me to describe what shopping for clothes is like.
I have tantrums in my own little way. And this one little breakthrough is helping to open my eyes to the plights of toddlers. Small things can be a big deal, no matter how old a person is. In those cases, you never want to belittle the upsetting thing, but react with empathy. Try to understand the frustration of wanting something, and just not being able to get it or have it happen. We all have to learn to deal with these strong emotions. Some of us take longer to master that skill, and that's ok. I turned out alright.
Two clarifications: 1) Yes, I am a fully functional adult and 2) Not the kicking and screaming kind of tantrum. I was just reading a bit of What to Expect the Toddler Years (the third in a series of go-to parenting books, for those not in the know), particularly a little sidebar about how tantrums are not just for kids. And it hit me that, in fact, I am one of those adults who sometimes cannot handle her emotions. Usually frustration. A lot of people have outburst when they are angry, yes. I just mean to say that I KNOW I'm one of them.
Examples, you ask? But of course. Just last week I accidentally left my purse at a bridal shower located an hour away, and didn't realize it until I had gotten home. Upon facing the prospect of driving another two hours that night, I started crying in frustration and desperation. Friends try to work through my problems like this with me, bless their hearts, but there are many times when I just have to have it out. I recall another time a couple years ago when it was my responsibility to get balloons for a roommate's birthday. Walgreens didn't have any. I looked and looked on campus and there were simply no balloons to be had. Not a big deal, right? Wrong. To me, it was a big deal. I cried about that too, venting my frustrations to another roommate.
I've cried over bad grades in college classes. I've thrown my phone against a wall because my reception was poor. Don't even ask me to describe what shopping for clothes is like.
I have tantrums in my own little way. And this one little breakthrough is helping to open my eyes to the plights of toddlers. Small things can be a big deal, no matter how old a person is. In those cases, you never want to belittle the upsetting thing, but react with empathy. Try to understand the frustration of wanting something, and just not being able to get it or have it happen. We all have to learn to deal with these strong emotions. Some of us take longer to master that skill, and that's ok. I turned out alright.
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